Agent__008 on Xanga

Weblog

Family Meeting

So tonight instead of watching TV, Dad thought it would be fun to have a family meeting. It was quite an experience to me and I really enjoyed it. The question that everyone had to answer was, how has God blessed you this weekend? Everyone went around and shared something. I said that I was reminded that God is always there and I need not to worry about school starting in the morning. And that I am constantly reminded of His love.
I love my weekends home. I am so blessed to have a family who loves me, who houses me and feeds me. I got three meals today! During the week I only eat one and it is not very big. I love talking with Mom and Dad and Grandma. I learn so much from them, even if it how a family is supposed to act.
I have gone through a whole lot of stuff over the past 21 years from being abused physically, mentally, verbally and raped. I have always questioned what love is. God has blessed me this summer and I can not thank Him enough. I love my family and this family meeting tonight made me look back and see how blessed I really am. :)

Am I an Orphan?

On Saturday my family came up and visited my boyfriend and his family for dinner. I was very nervous and I had all right to be. Looking back, things did not go well at all. My parents lied to his parents saying I am lazy and mean and a whole lot of other things. I was getting tired of it, but knew my parents were leaving soon. Before they left, my boyfriend's father was thanking my parents and telling them how much of a blessing I have been on his life. My father had the nerve to say, "well at least she is a blessing to someone." WOW. That hurt. That hurt alot. What kind of father tells a stranger that his daughter is a neusance?!?
I am grateful for the relationship I have with my boyfriend's family. I finally feel loved, respected and wanted. It does not replace the hole I have concerning the pain my own parents have caused, but it is better than having nooone. I have told my co-workers this incident and they have told me to disown my parents. It is a great idea, I mean, why would I want to go home to such a bad situation when I can go to my boyfriend's? But if I disown them, am I an orphan? Can someone who is over 21 be an orphan?
I guess it does not matter because I am a forgiving person and I try to get along with my parents. God has been gracious to me this year. Sent wonderful people into my life and has provided friends, family, a home and a steady income that pays for basic needs.

Home Sick

To be honest, for about a week now, I have become homesick. As the week goes on it becomes worse and worse. I am not homesick in the sense that I miss my parents, but in the sense that miss the church family. I miss singing and playing the guitar. I miss my friends. And I am here in Lancaster stuck. I am impatiently awaiting an email that will either break or make this homesickness. I wish that song by Micheal W Smith "Friends" were true. It states, "Friends will be friends forever" I hate saying goodbye and this song implies that regardless of what happens, friends will always be friends. HA. Anyway, right now all I want is a hug from my friend back home.

My 21st!

So Wednesday was my birthday. I have had some horrific days lately and my birthday was so encouraging. I worked at 6am and when I went to work at 8am there were 3 gifts and a card on my desk. At 3:40, I went to class and I was reading a book when all of a sudden the lights went out! They came in with a cake and 21 candles. I was totally shocked and happy. At 7pm I went to the Fulton Opera Theater in Lancaster and saw 'Glorious!'. It is a story about Florence Jenkins, the worse singer in the world. The singing was so bad, but it was so funny. After the play, I came back to the suite and my section through me and a friend a surprise party. I knew nothing about it and I was so happy and encouraged. The day was amazing and quite a memory. To add icing to the cake, my friend Ray called and sang to me. My birthday could not have come at a better time and I am finally able to drink and carry a hand weapon. I am thinking about alot right now, especially concerning my future but at the moment I am enjoy the company of friends and the blessing that comes with it. **FYI, I did not party or drink. I want to soon ;)

My Community

I am a resident at a small Bible College in Lancaster. Some people absolutely hate this place because it is too small and word travels so fast. Tis true. Word travels and sometimes it seems as if we are in a "Christian bubble". The "Christian Bubble" is an environment composed of Christians who believe nothing bad can happen to a person or the world. This can cause a problem, but there are many good things. I am surrounded by loving, caring Christians who want the best for me. Who lift me up when I am down and rejoice with me when I am happy. Where else can I live where I will be constantly reminded of the love of God? Where else at one in the morning can I vent to someone? Where else do adults, supervisors, bosses, secretaries and janitors care about what is going on in every student's life? I love the community in which I live.

[no tags]

Don't worry - your calendar is here… to see it in action just click "Save" above and refresh the page.

I am 21 and love the arts; theater, drama, musicals, architecture and anything that has character. I am in college and work too much so I can pay for it. I work at a daycare in the infant room. I love children and showing them love that they may not nessessarily get at home. I am in a steady relationship with a great guy. Usually, I put my friends' needs, wants and feelings before mine. My life is an open book because I do not want others to make the same mistakes I made.